Lani Charlwood Blog

In these volatile times, leaders face a difficult question: how do we hold onto integrity and still lead with joy and hope? 

Exploring the Meaning of Integrity

Integrity was something we discussed at length in our Windsor Leadership programme. We found ourselves asking: what is integrity, really? Is it simply doing what we say we’ll do? By that definition, even a controversial figure like Donald Trump could be said to act with integrity, if only because he is (mostly) consistent. 

But I’ve come to believe integrity goes further than consistency. It begins with humility - the recognition that none of us has a monopoly on truth and that each of us views the world through our own biases and experiences. With that awareness, we can genuinely seek truth, understanding and justice - and therein lies our integrity. Integrity is not about being right; it’s about doing what we believe is right, while remaining open to the possibility that we might be wrong. 

Integrity as a Daily Practice

Integrity, though, is not static. It’s tested daily: in how we respond to pressure, how we treat those who disagree with us and how we behave when nobody is watching. Small, consistent actions build trust and trust is the currency of credible leadership. In uncertain times, people look to leaders not for perfection but for coherence; to know that our words, decisions and actions align. 

Good leaders have to accept that we don’t have all the answers. Nobody does. Nor are we expected to, most of the time. We’re leading towards the right answers, we don’t always come equipped with them. And to lead in that direction, we must not only be willing to have difficult conversations, but determined to lead them well, with grace, conviction, understanding and humility. 

The Role of Conflict in Pursuing Integrity

If integrity is about the pursuit of what’s right, then conflict is its natural companion. Because when we seek truth together, disagreement is inevitable. 

To quote one of the stages in Patrick Lencioni’s Five Dysfunctions of a Team model, we cannot have a fear of conflict characterising our leadership. Healthy conflict, when modelled with integrity, leads to deeper understanding and stronger commitment to decisions. But nor can we lead with a hard heart, unwilling to compromise. 

Leadership Style and Organisational Culture

And while action and direction can be shaped from the ground up, culture is almost always shaped from the top down. The style, demeanour and opinions of the leader filter into the senior team and down through the ranks. As does their disagreement style and their approach to integrity in conflict. The way we show up when things get tense sets the tone for how others will too. 

My father worked with Margaret Thatcher. Though many disagreed with her decisions, he always said she acted from conviction; she did what she truly believed was right. You may not agree with her politics, but there’s something to admire in that courage of conviction. 

More recently, when Sir Keir Starmer was trying to appeal to the Conservative vote ahead of the 2024 General Election, he recognised that same quality, acknowledging Thatcher’s sense of purpose even as he disagreed with her actions. In doing so, he highlighted the profound importance of vision and purpose in leadership and modelled how we can admire certain traits even when we don’t share someone’s views. 

What a dull world it would be if we all thought the same!

Disagreement and conflict are part of the essence of life, but they are not healthy if the motive is to be right, rather than to understand and do right. Which brings us back to joy, because joy is often what allows us to stay open-hearted in the midst of difference

The Power of Joy in Leadership

So, if integrity anchors us and conflict refines us, where does joy fit in? In the demanding world of leadership, joy can sometimes feel like a luxury. But perhaps it’s the very thing that sustains our integrity. 

True joy isn’t found in circumstances, in the world around us, or even in other people. It’s deeper than happiness, which depends on what happens to us. Joy endures. It gives us the agility to step back from any moment, view change and uncertainty through the lens of gratitude and re-engage with integrity, purpose and a determination to do the right thing. 

Joy also radiates outward. Leaders who carry a sense of joy, even amid challenge, give permission for others to find meaning and hope in their work. In that sense, joy becomes an act of service, one that keeps both leaders and their teams grounded and resilient. 

Cultivating Joy: A Lifelong Journey

That makes it all sound rather easy. I know it isn’t. Cultivating joy is a lifelong journey, but one well worth taking. To notice joy in the everyday - much like in Matt Haig’s The Life Impossible, which I’ve just finished reading and would highly recommend - takes discipline and persistence. 

But it starts with wanting to find joy, to see change and to be part of the pursuit; to act justly, love mercy and walk humbly. When we lead with integrity, embrace healthy conflict and nurture joy, we create the conditions for others to flourish too. 

That’s the kind of leader I aspire to be. How about you? 

Key Takeaways

• Times are tough and leaders are facing a deeper question: how do we hold onto integrity and still lead with joy and hope?
   
• Integrity begins with humility, the recognition that none of us has a monopoly on truth and that each of us views the world through our own biases and experiences.
  
  
• Integrity is not about being right; it is about doing what we believe is right while remaining open to the possibility that we might be wrong.
  
  
• Integrity is tested daily in how we respond to pressure, how we treat those who disagree with us and how we behave when nobody is watching. Small, consistent actions build trust and trust is the currency of credible leadership.
  
  
• Healthy conflict, when modelled with integrity, leads to deeper understanding and stronger commitment to decisions. But we cannot lead with a hard heart unwilling to compromise.
   
• Culture is shaped from the top down. The style, demeanour and disagreement approach of a leader filter through an organisation and set the tone for how others behave.
  
  
• Joy gives us the agility to step back, view change and uncertainty through the lens of gratitude and re-engage with integrity and purpose. It sustains us, grounds us and creates the conditions for others to flourish too.